Free Life Blog

Am I an Addict?

By Chris Bunton

Yes, you are. You might not be sleeping in alleyways with a needle in your arm or standing in line at the dispensary or buying the cheapest liquor you can find, but you are addicted to something.

Mcdonald’s fries, gambling, religion, Facebook, work, Netflix, sex, your hobby, chocolate, running, stealing, sin, anything can become an addiction. Why do we become so easily addicted? We become addicted easily because; humans were created to become devoted to God, the good things of life, and fulfilling our purpose. Addiction was created for our good, it is supposed to help us focus, but it has become warped.

The enemy distracts us from what we are supposed to be focused on. Our enemy uses outside chemicals, and internal chemicals and hormones to give us pleasure in order to pull us away from God, the good things of life, and what we were created to do. We are our own worst enemies, it is true. But, we are not alone. There are demonic forces attacking us as well.

The list I gave you is full of bad and good things. We must strive and pray for balance in our lives. We must seek to rid ourselves of the things that drag us down and kill us, and rob us. Perfect freedom is you and Christ only. Then, He brings everything else into your life. None of us are perfect. He makes us perfect, when we turn to Him, and then He works on us. I’m showing you what is perfect, so we know where we stand. I’m not trying to get you to give up McDonald’s fries. I’m trying to get you to let God, work in your life, because He knows what’s best. He will help you to remove things, and get you to be glad it’s gone. Our addiction should be God, good things, and our purpose.

Do I miss being a drunk? Sometimes, I think of the old days, and I remember spending times with friends, cooking food, adventures, excitement. And fun. I start too long to have those things again. But, then I remember the fights with those same friends, puking up those yummy meals, and going to jail on those adventures. I remember the fear of that cop car behind me in the rear view mirror, the loss of family, children, jobs, reputation and my whole life. That settles it. That drives the devil away, and I go longer and longer periods between thoughts like this. Eventually, I begin to hate that old life, and what it does to people. What it does to children and our society.

We are addicts. The first step is to admit it, and confess it to Him, and let Him remove it by whatever means he chooses. Are you desperate enough to let God take over and remove it? Do you trust Him enough to be willing to fall on your knees and surrender all? Even if He kills you? Even if He takes everything from you? Even if He makes it to where you never see your loved ones, again? Even if He locks you up for good? Are you really desperate?

We will often fail. These are battles, but we will win the war. We have already won if we turned to Him. Remember that. When we fail, we confess it to God, and let Him work. We keep confessing, and keep confessing, trusting that He loves us, and is on our side. He knows best, and is working to remove that thing we cling to. Eventually, you will see it gone. Eventually, you will have balance and freedom. Just remain with Him.

We did not get screwed up over night, and it will also take time for God to work those things out of us. He will remove things as He sees fit, and is best. Trust Him.

(Bio: Chris Bunton is a writer, blogger, poet and editor from Southern Illinois.)

Cell Block Sounds

by Chris Bunton

I was locked up in prison,
on an aggravated charge.
I had stabbed a man like me,
another tough guy, just like me.

I taught myself to whistle,
a dozen well loved tunes.
It soothed me, and brought joy;
in a place where hate ruled the day.

It was night, when we lock down,
and I whistled out the cell door;
into the massive steel hall,
lined with cells, full of hard men, just like me.

“Amazing Grace” flew from my lips,
and floated ghostly echoing down the hall.
A long mournful dirge, like taps,
on a silent battlefield.

The next day I was on the yard in the sun;
when a giant of a man came to me.
He stormed at me with a purpose,
and I got ready for a fight to come.

“You the one whistling at night?”
He asked, pointing a finger at me.
Now I really thought we would fight.
“Yeah, it’s me.” I said, I ain’t no punk.

He softened and looked at me,
his eyes welling with tears.
“Man, I was beat and lying there in my bunk.
I was done. I was ready to give up.”

“But, I prayed and asked God to help.
And just then, your song came through.
That sound of Amazing Grace,
that my momma sang to me…”

“I remembered my Grandma is praying for me,
and that God is on my side.
And I decided to live another day,
to get outta this place.”

He held his fist out for a manly bump,
and I bumped his fist with love,
in a place filled with hate,
surrounded by tough guys, just like me

Stealing Our Rights

By Chris Bunton

Before I went to prison I felt that I had rights. But, as soon as I got arrested, and before I was even convicted, I started to learn that my rights were at the mercy of others, who interpreted those rights differently. Their interpretation always benefited the system, and never benefited me.

I learned that they will lie to you, but you better not lie to them. I learned that even though you have the right to remain silent and not be compelled to bear witness against yourself, it doesn’t mean they won’t try like hell to get you to do it. I learned that you have the right to bear arms, but as soon as you are charged they will try to strip those guns from you before you are even found guilty. And then, if you are found guilty of a felony you will lose the right to bear arms for life. I learned that “Innocent till proven guilty in a court of law” is actually interpreted as “innocent till proven guilty IN a court of law.” Meaning that the only place you’re considered innocent is within the four walls of a court room; if even there.

I learned that I have the right to not have excessive bail. But, that the definition of “excessive” is not determined by poor people, or even the average American. I learned that you have the right to a speedy trial, after you sit in jail for months. Then, after the prosecutor asks the judge for an extension, you will sit in jail for months more. You have the right to a jury, unless they coerce you into waiving your right to jury with promises that it will make the judge and prosecutor happy. You have the right to a trial, unless they compel you to plead guilty because they threaten you with decades in prison if you don’t plead, and promise you only a couple of years or probation, if you do.

I learned my rights during my divorce, when my word as a man was considered a lie, and I was treated as a criminal while only having the protections of a civil case. It’s where I was considered guilty simply at the word of a disgruntled ex. I was compelled to surrender all evidence of finances, as if I had any. I thought we were to be secure in our papers?

But, that is only for criminals. At least that is what they told me. I would like to see where it mentions a difference between criminal and civil in the Constitution. Where does it say in the Constitution that the burden of proof is different in a civil and criminal case. Does life and liberty not include finances? If you can go to jail for refusal to comply, doesn’t that make it criminal? Could I have an attorney appointed to me for free for that? Well, of course not. They can garnish your wages, lock you up for contempt, hound you in every aspect of your life, and make sure you cannot escape your “responsibility”. Millions of Americans have gone through this corrupt family court process, had children stolen from them, been reduced to poverty, and been driven to suicide or other acts of destruction, and nothing changes.

I could go on and on, but the point is that when I hear people telling me that the law or government, or bureaucrats, will protect my rights, or freedom, or privacy, I laugh, because if they won’t do it in the good times, they sure won’t do it in the bad times.

That brings us to the point, because folks will say, “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.”, and other such witty things. They seek to refuse sympathy to those who have their rights stripped from them, claiming they deserve it. These same people will wave flags claiming to support Liberty, and do not really understand it.

The problem is that those in power have always stripped freedom or rights from the people no one cares about. This allows the rulers to become experts at it long before they strip rights from the general population. Whether destroying liberty is intentional or planned, there is always a potential for a slippery slope.

Our country is based on individual liberty, which is why the Founders gave us a Republic, not a Democracy; we are not to bow down to Rulers, or Mob rule. If we allow rights to be stripped from criminals, or those we label as criminals, then what stops the rulers from making more and more laws, to create more criminals?

Freedom is scary. To be free, we must allow others to be free. We must take responsibility and stand up against real oppression, whether inside our minds or in the world around us. When we are free we might fail, we might fall, but that’s the thrill of life.

In prison everything was provided, everything was equal, and everything was controlled. After leaving prison, I can plainly see how the system that rules us greatly resembles a prison, and grows more prison-like by the day. More liberty is the answer to many of the problems in our society. Not all problems. Some things need direction from limited authority, as the Founders imply in the Constitution.

It’s way past time to wake up and turn back the clock. It’s time to spread freedom, before the door is shut forever.

Illinois Supports Crime

Currently, in the State of Illinois, a citizen who has been convicted of a felony is barred from obtaining dozens of different types of employment licenses. A felon can often work under someone who has the license, but they cannot be the licenses holder. Such as in roofing, a felon cannot be a licensed roofer, but they can be a laborer for a roofer.

This blockage to success seriously affects the earning capability of anyone who has been convicted of a felony for life. In Illinois, that means that hundreds of thousands of people cannot obtain professional licenses to work. That also means that the families of these felons are forced into a lower class and suffer potential poverty. This is a punishment on children who have done nothing wrong. We claim to want to lift families out of poverty, but we have these laws that keep them there. When we take into account that the majority of felons in Illinois are of a minority status; how can we claim to help the disadvantaged, while having laws that bar them from business opportunities?

In my opinion, these laws are violations of the Constitution, and the concepts of Liberty. Do we really believe in punishing people for life based upon crimes that we would never give them a life sentence for? The fact is that issuing licenses is an administrative task; likewise denying a license is an administrative act. It is a means of punishing people that circumvents Constitutional protections, and due process. A person is to be considered innocent till proven guilty in a court of law. By denying them a license based upon some past conduct, is to judge them guilty of doing potential crimes, in the distant future. This punishment denies real due process, and the presumption of innocence.

Felons have served their time. The sentence for their crime carried a certain level of punishment that the citizen was convicted of or plead guilty to. That includes, time in prison, fines, restitution, and probation or parole. Along with other types of conditions that are designed to help the person succeed, such as counseling, drug testing, classes, employment, staying away from certain people, among others. But, all of these have a light at the end of the tunnel. Denying licenses for employment keeps them in poverty for life or very long periods. It can push them to break the law in order to get ahead or make ends meet. When does the punishment end? Laws have been passed recently that allow some of these licenses to be obtained with a waiver, or are only restricted for a period of time, but many others do not, and employers still do background checks.

Now let’s be clear, I’m not talking about giving a license to open a daycare to a sex offender, we can have some common sense restrictions. I’m talking about denying all licenses to all felons for life. The list of licenses denied felons is lengthy. Currently dozens of jobs are barred for felons. And we are not just talking about the guy who got out of prison last week. We are talking about people who have broken the law decades ago, and are still treated as criminals. They are barred from having a license to be a roofer, hair dresser, meat cutter, nurse, cna, realtor, embalmer, funeral director, nail tech, and the list goes on and on.

Now, understand that it’s not just Illinois, but other states as well. What does this do to our crime rate? That’s the focus of this article. Does denying people licenses, cause them to remain in a state of poverty that leads them to a life that leads to criminal acts? Does it cause them to feel hopeless and use drugs? Does the use of drugs lead to crime? Does addiction lead to theft and more violence? Do desperate people commit crimes? Do people with no hope care about your society? Do these laws push people into crime? How does this affect the recidivism rate?

Of course, there will be those who blame the criminal, and say that there is no excuse. And yes, we can say those things from our ivory towers. Yes. The criminal is guilty, but we deceive ourselves if we think that there are not many factors that lead to crime. I’m not just talking about the guy who robs 20 liquor stores, and kills a clerk. I’m talking about the college kid who has a future, and gets drunk, and commits a crime. I’m talking about the father who has a beer after work, and accidentally runs over a construction worker. There are tons of people around us every day that committed a crime years ago, and have never crossed that line again. Yet, they are still treated as failed.

And to those folks who say “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.” Your cruelty and desire to never show mercy are reasons why folks fall off the edge and hurt others or commit crimes. Criminals are a reflection of society. You have a society full of people addicted to drugs, because they want to escape their misery and slavery. You have people who feel the need to steal because their basic needs are lacking, and they are surrounded by grotesque amounts of wealth, and pressure to succeed. You have people doing violent things, because they have no means of resolving problems. You have people living in a cycle of poverty and crime because the system is designed to keep us down.

It is past time to start helping citizens instead of putting road blocks in front of them. If the government cannot help them, then they need to get out of the way. If the church will not help them, then they need to stop throwing stones. Felons are not going to just disappear. The poor will be with you always, and will not go away. They will sleep outside your golden gates, while you feast. But, it doesn’t have to be that way. We can love them, forgive them, and allow them and their families to have real chances to succeed. At the very least, our system should no longer be something that can be blamed for a person’s failure. We should strive to be above reproach, and then the blame can truly only fall on the individual.

Are You Growing?

What is God working on in your life? Are there things that you know needs to change? Are you praying for God to show you and help you to overcome things in your life? Pray and ask God to show you what He sees about you. Ask Him to reveal to you, your sins and anything wrong; so you can confess them to Him and start working on them.

Recently, I’ve prayed about anxiety in my life. My mind often runs amok, with all kinds of concerns and accusations. God has given me a means to resolve this, and I am working on it. That is what I am growing into now. That is what I’m working on. God is working too.

You might have Anger, Pride, Fear, Doubt, Negativity, Addictions, Materialism, Hatred, Gluttony, Lust, or any number of other things. Are you trying to overcome them? Are you giving them to God?

Are you working on something to improve yourself? It should be spiritual things. But, it could also be learning a new subject. Learning a new hobby? Are you trying new things, new books, new foods and new travels?

Are you growing? Are you growing straight or crooked? Maybe you need to be tied up straight? Maybe you need pruned, or fertilized? Maybe you need more light or water? Maybe more space to grow? Maybe there are too many weeds, or insects gnawing at your growth?

Are you growing? Only live things grow. Pray and ask God to save you and bring you to life in Christ Jesus. Pray for Him to grow you, and let Him show you where and how to work on yourself. Let God grow you.

My Plumber

My toilet sucked.
It would not flush.
I was like a caveman,
with an outhouse.

So, I called my plumber;
he estimated thousands,
to help me fit in,
with all my neighbors.

It was way too much,
but he had a plan.
He knew a Man,
who handed out grants.

He had a friend,
who gladly loaned,
me money
backed by the Man.

The plumbers bill,
was paid in full.
But, it all seemed planned,
like a well laid scam.

My toilet flushes,
but there’s no water.
And now I owe the Man,
for giving me a hand.

By the way,
this was not my plumber.
It was the college,
they said I needed.

It was the place,
the councilor pushed.
And all the jobs,
required.

(Photograph is President William Henry Harrison’s house in Vincennes, Indiana at Vincennes University)

The Art Fair

Sun shiny day;
free after lock down.

White tents in rows,
flags waving,
smells lifting,
and the music plays.

The search begins;
for that perfect piece.

Tent by tent;
a smile and a nod.

“I like that.”
“It’s beautiful.”
“How much?”

Move along;
the hunt goes on,
for that piece that speaks,
and sings.

That local art,
that awakens,
something within.

That beauty,
that demands to come home.

(Photograph: Cedarhurst Art Center, Mt. Vernon, Illinois.)

I Support

I support freedom, in all its ways.

I support the freedom to live, and earn as your purpose calls.

I support the working man’s call for life.

I support protecting this world.

I support the original instructions, and Love’s law.

I support the hope for a better day

I support the faith it will come.

I support the effort to make it so.

I support the idea that we can keep the good, and toss the bad.

I support life, love, and the spirit of God.

I support YOU, and your efforts to live, and be free.

I support US, as we strive to just be.

(Photograph: Shore of Kentucky Lake, Kentucky)

Prudes

I’m a Christian. But, I get so irritated with some of the stuff I see Christians pushing. For example, I just saw a Christian friend post a meme with a Bible verse about how in the last days perilous times shall come. “Men shall be lovers of their own selves”…, the verse says. The meme shows a picture of a guy and a girl taking selfies. Because taking a selfie is the definition of self love apparently. Now, it’s fine if someone believes this. But, this guy posted this meme from a Facebook page that has a profile pic, which is a selfie.

The idea behind the verse is to not be selfish. It’s not condemning self love. You cannot love others if you have no love of yourself. It’s impossible to empathize with a person. You cannot treat someone the same way you would want to be treated if you do not love yourself. You would be like “Sure! It’s ok to rob you. I think I should be robbed also. I have no self worth so you shouldn’t either. Why are you crying? I’m doing unto you what I think should be done to me. I’m not worth much.” I just get irritated with some of the ideas people have.

I saw a Christian article that talked about how some movies are damaging to the soul. They are full of bad words, and dirty things. A part of me agrees with what they are saying, but then I think. The Bible was written by people who lived in dirt floor huts and saw animals having sex daily. They probably heard and saw their parents having sex, and brothers, and cousins. They knew what sex was from the age of a toddler. The entire world in modern times is the same way; only in America are we shielded from such things.

People in the days of the Roman Empire when the New Testament was written, saw women breastfeeding in public all the time. It was not sexual. But today, if you see a movie that shows a breast, you are called wicked for watching it. If you are at the mall and breastfeed your kid, people want to hang a Scarlet A on your neck. It’s ridiculous, and creates a situation that has led to hard core porn. A response to denying people freedom is for the person to go find it elsewhere and get destroyed. It’s the idea of the forbidden fruit. The Bible teaches that wicked people will be wicked. They must be spiritually transformed. But, these Pharisee Christians act like laws can stop evil. Laws have value, but they cannot transform people, only Jesus Christ can do that, and we need to stop expecting the un-redeemed to act in a spiritual manner. The laws we impose, will be used against us, and are being used against us.

King David danced through the streets naked in celebration of the Arks return. But, these folks consider nudity wrong. No your heart is wrong. The Bible was written in a time when public executions were demanded by God, and were performed at the city gate. It was legal to kill your son if he was disobedient. Armies were legally able to keep slaves from conquered peoples. These were women who they turned into trophy wives.

These prudes wanna worry about false teaching. They should be concerned about the teachers in their midst who are putting weights on their shoulders that even they cannot bear. It’s totally ridiculous. Yes, God ordained public executions, but folks like these say that your video game is the devil. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying anything bad about God; I’m talking about the idea that God supports some of our ridiculous notions about sex and violence. I do not think He does. His law and the actions of his servants prove it. He desires Love.

When you preach against looking at porn, homosexuality, and fornication more than you do about loving and helping the poor, then you probably have missed the boat somewhere. Maybe if you preached about helping the poor and got your congregation to do something, there might be fewer girls willing to sell themselves for money in the porn industry. Maybe they wouldn’t feel that they are alone to pull themselves up by their own garter belt.

Maybe if we stopped preaching about fornication, and started preaching about loving the sinner, and helping those in need, maybe there would be fewer abortions, because young girls know they have support for their ruined life. Maybe if they didn’t feel like their life was ruined in the first place, they wouldn’t think they should hide it and get rid of the baby they made.

Is it possible that if we focused on love, and helping each other, we would be able to play a part in people’s lives, and be able to tell them about Jesus Christ? Maybe we would be in a position to explain how our life choices lead us to places we do not want to go. There are huge amounts of people who do not respond to being preached at. They respond to love, truth, wisdom, and hope.

We focus on the wrong things, and millions suffer for it.

(Photographs: Ceiling of the Nation Museum of the American Indian in D.C. and A sculpture of Romulus and Remus suckling on the she-wolf, in the National Gallery of Art.)